Just Living Life

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One of the most difficult things that those of us with disabilities face in most any situation is the fact that the media often portrays any sort of challenge as “heroic”.  The term used by many individuals with disabilities is “inspiro-porn” meaning that stories and other portrayals are usually framed with the notion that people with disabilities and the stories involving us are newsworthy, they’re “magical”, or something similar. 

Luckily, I grew up with a twin sister who isn’t directly affected by any sort of challenge, so my disability was never shed in the “inspirational” light. 

I’ll never understand why this story highlights the fact that this young man is now in a wheelchair to emphasize that he finished college. Finishing college is a wonderful milestone for anyone, regardless of their preferred method of mobility. Or why the fact that this senior in high school went to prom with a “crush, close friend” ends up on a CBS website. It’s 2014; if these stories are truly newsworthy, why are my parents, very normal, average, middle class folks, not being chased by the paparazzi as they travel to work each day? These people are normal people doing everyday things like going to prom and going to college, so why isn’t every person who goes to college or who goes to prom with a close friend interviewed by a national news outlet?

Take me, for example. I’m certainly excited, honored, and thrilled to be attending a nationally ranked university for graduate school. My program is even #17 in the nation. Does my excitement have anything to do with the fact that I’m going to be a graduate student with a disability living in Lexington, Kentucky and attending the University of Kentucky? I honestly haven’t even thought about it in that vein. I’m going to further my education, just like anyone, with or without a disability, would have the opportunity to do. Is the fact that I’m moving 400 miles from anything familiar a feat because I have a disability? No, it’s a feat because I haven’t known anything else in my nearly 24 years, save the fact that I went to college in a small, rural town about two hours away for four and a half years. I won’t lie and say that I haven’t found extreme comfort in the fact that there are over 1,000 students with disabilities at the University of Kentucky. I can say one thing for certain for each and every one of us: we aren’t attending school simply because we have disabilities. Iff anything, society would tell us, just as these “news stories” have implied, that it would be much easier for us to sit around and wait on the cameras. Instead, we choose to better ourselves, better our society, and better the futures of generations.

I don’t want media attention because I’m doing what people my age and in my stage of life are typically doing; I just want a smile. And I want people to recognize that it wasn’t any more difficult or easier for me to gain admission into my program. I want people to realize that the best recognition that they can give me is equality because, truthfully, I’m just living life.

Why Research?

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When I stepped into my first research methods course a little over two years ago, it changed my world. As an academic, I’ve come to realize that many people are confused by a passion for research, but lately, it’s shaping up to be an intense passion. So, what does a beginning researcher glean from conducting empirically based research?

I find that research gives my field purpose. As an undergraduate psychology student, it was hard to imagine myself as anything more than a clinician. After declaring the major, I knew that one either went on to do something completely different in other avenues of education, or you were just that: a psychologist. This course, taught by a young professor who was in his first year of teaching, opened my eyes to the world of empirical research. Throughout the course, we learned everything from the basics of correct source citations and in-text citations to how to propose our own research. The final project entailed our proposing a research project with simulated results. The paper was the most exhilarating one I’d ever written at that time because the work was all my own. The ideas were all my own, and like most of my fellow students, I felt validated and empowered. I finally saw a solid contribution that I could and would make to any field of study. It’s always wise to leave things better than when you found them, and research allows me the opportunity to do exactly that.

Research satiates my hunger to know more. Psychology and related fields are endless contains of knowledge. There isn’t ever  a possibility where someone will know everything there is to know, and that’s almost the most satisfying thing about my hopeful lifetime career in academia. Knowing more also means that the field is able to help people in new, innovative ways that may save a life, a family, hope, joy, love, or any of those things. Because people like myself submit to research journals, we’re contributing to the education of colleagues so that people may enjoy prosperous, productive lives. I always long for that, and research satisfies the longing.

Writing and presentation are two of my favorite academic assignments. Obviously, I’m a blogger, so I enjoy writing, but words are truly beautiful things. I came to appreciate them when I began to read at 4 years of age, and it hasn’t stopped since. Using those words to help advance the field and to help people come to new understandings is simply a joy. In terms of presentation, it thrills me to find ways to interact with others about my research interest, as well as to help them become more educated and involved regarding the topic. During my first conference presentation a little over two years ago, it was most definitely exhilarating. Helping others to find interest by way of my presentation or my writing is thrilling, and by communicating findings, I feel as though I’ve paved the way for additional questions to be formulated.

Many people ask why I am so excited for graduate school, and it’s fairly simple. It’s rooted in research, learning, and teaching.

Why Rehabilitation Counseling? My Story

The number one question that I, or anyone who is entering a new phase of education, am asked is about my program of study. And since many are unsure of the field, I thought I’d take some time to delve into the purpose, the motives, and the duties. Equally important is my choice to enter the field, and there is certainly a story there.

When most people hear the words “rehabilitation” and “counseling”, they automatically think about substance abuse and the like. While we will work with clients who have substance abuse difficulties, we will examine and mitigate the effects of the abuse that may be disabling. In addition, it is nearly impossible for a counselor to serve a client who is an active drug user because of his or her inability to be employed.  For example, a client with many years of substance abuse may have memory recall complications. In that instance, depending on the specific circumstance, the client may find that it affects him or her in the workplace or otherwise. A rehabilitation counselor would work to find strategies to help the client to achieve the maximum level of independence and self-sufficiency possible in every aspect of life. For an adult, it may be focused in the workplace, but for a college student, the efforts would be toward success and mitigation of the effects on academic success.

Most often, according to CORE (Council on Rehabilitation Education), an accreditation organization for graduate programs, “[r]ehabilitation [c]ounseling emphasizes empowerment of individuals with disabilities to maximize employability, attain economic self-sufficiency, independence, inclusion, and integration into American society. The philosophical foundation of rehabilitation counseling includes the belief in advocacy and the rights of people with disabilities.  Rehabilitation counseling emphasizes integration and inclusion, focusing on assets of people, and assisting in the pursuit of independence. By moving from a status of dependence to a status of independence, personal adjustment and/or the opportunity to succeed economically, via employment, can be achieved.”

Yet, you still have that question. Why? How?

You see, it started when I was 15 years old. I spent the summer volunteering nearly 50 hours per week at a children’s respite center for children who were determined to be medically fragile.  Ironically enough, most of them shared a diagnostic label with me. And as a just-turned 15 year old, that was hard to see.  I didn’t know, at the time, how to articulate exactly what I was feeling, but I know now that I was grappling with the fact that I honestly didn’t think it was fair that people with the same diagnostic label could perform and such a wide range of levels. Why were these children confined to a wheelchair, but I was the one able to walk? I’d worked brief stints in a self-contained classroom, but giving parents a break seemed like more tangible, meaningful work at that point in my life.

As life progressed and I started having to make decisions, pray over my calling, and devote my life to a purpose, I discovered rehabilitation counseling through a mentor during my junior year of high school. He was the director of disability services during my first three years of college, and he’d gotten his degree at the age of 40 while working full time and raising two children through the online degree program at the University of Kentucky. He does his work with such passion and purpose, and honestly, it was and is infectious.

The fact that my whole career will be spent advocating for and ensuring that people with disabilities are gainfully employed and have means of self-sufficiency just warms my heart. That’s the way it should be. I can’t imagine a place where just because someone looks differently or acts differently, it may affect their chances to enter the workforce. If I put my left leg into my pants first instead of my right, does it mean that I left my house without wearing pants? No. It just means that I did it a bit differently.

Next time you see someone out working in a public place who may accomplish the work task in a non-traditional way, stop and think. Now, you’re also aware of those of us who ensure that everyone is created equal within the workplace.

I ask you: Why NOT rehabilitation counseling?

How Kentucky?

People who know me and who have become aware of my acceptance of the University of Kentucky's offer of admission often ask me why I chose it and how in the world I would ever choose to move 400 miles from anything I've ever known.

I thought I'd share the story that's turning out to be quite beautiful. First, you should know that the decision to attend UK and participate in the on-campus program wasn't my original intent.

In late November and early December,  prior to my graduation from college, I had a few interviews with people who worked for companies that had job openings that I desperately wanted. To my surprise at the time, I was rejected from all three and simply got discouraged.

After the first interview that I'd had, that rejection email sent me into a pile of tears for hours. Now, I know that those tears were tears of impatience. Despite the outcome,  I'm more than grateful for the experience now, but at the time, it was ruining my definition of perfect. You know, I was going to live in a quaint college town, get my Master's degree online from the same program at Kentucky, and earn a little bit of money all along the way. Granted, all of the communities and towns that I'd consider couldn't meet my transportation needs as well as actually having a public transit service readily ply available.

I spent the first month after graduation relaxing for the first time in 4.5 years and enjoying the holidays with my family. In the back of my head, there was always that question of "What's next?" lingering in the back of my head.  The end of December came, and I decided that I'd go ahead and get things ready to apply to the program. I started with an email to the Disability Resource Center at UK to inquire about services available to students. My parents and I were tucked away in a mountain cabin for New Year's, and I knew I wouldn't get a response for a few days.

On January 2, I received a phone call from the director of the DRC, and he was genuinely interested in who I was and what attracted me to my field and to the university.  We chatted for a week or so before "it" happened. I went to bed one night really content with the fact that distance learning is quite a bit less in tuition than an on-campus program and felt that I had made the right decision.  The next morning, the friend that I stayed with on my first visit messaged me via Facebook to tell me that she saw that I posted this video and that I was considering UK. She then let me know that she lives  and works in Lexington and wondered if I was actually thinking about moving there.

I hadn’t ever even considered it, and to be honest, I just didn’t think I could do it. All this talk about public transit being a real thing started to seem like just a figment of  my imagination, and more importantly, how would I survive 400 miles from home? I picked up the phone to run the idea by my mom, even though I was still skeptical myself.

To my surprise, my mom was extremely supportive and mentioned to me that I had just received a refund check that would cover my airfare costs to stay with my friend if I wanted to just to test the waters.  I knew that at that point, I had thinking and praying to do like I’d never done it before. Moving that far away from home seems daunting, but I’ve always known that prayer is a powerful thing and is a storehouse for strength when doubt comes along.

That night and for many nights after that, I prayed for clarity. I didn’t pray for answers. The next morning, it’s almost as if God audibly woke me pup that morning. I sat straight up in bed and said aloud, “I’m moving to Lexington.” I was in shock. but I threw my glasses on my face and reached for the phone to call Jake, the director of the DRC. We chatted for awhile, and I remember one of my first questions being whether or not I would be able to physically be at UK and have all of my needs met. He went on to explain that I absolutely would, some of the services that they could provide, and then he let me know that there were many students on campus in similar situations to my own.

At first, I was going to enroll as a distance learning student as planned and then visit to see if I wanted to change to an on-campus student, but I felt such a strong calling to Lexington and to the situation that was being presented that it wasn’t necessary at that point. I was able to go out there three weekends ago and absolutely fell in love.

I was in a meeting with the Accommodations Consultant who was very open in saying that it was a God thing, and I couldn’t agree more. I’m so excited to see how the journey unfolds, and I look forward to chronicling it! Patience is indeed a virtue, my friends, and it may prove that God needs you somewhere other than where you’d originally thought or intended. It’s apparent to me that there are clients in Lexington who need me, and God wants me there to help.

Here am I. Send me.

My First Visit

Three weekends ago, I visited Lexington for the first time, and I am more than in love with the city. If you follow me on Facebook, you've seen the trip updates and pictures, but I thought putting them in one place would be nice. Also, I've started a Facebook page for this blog where you can (soon!) find all the posts on this blog, links, resources, and information related to graduate school, relocation state-by-state, neat Kentucky facts, and more!

My flight was at 7:00pm to leave Atlanta for Lexington. Boarding was quite simple between the gate attendant and the flight attendant's assistance. I was so excited to know that it was so easy! This, the view from my window in Atlanta:

 

Because what's a Delta flight without Coke and peanuts? The in-flight snack really helped to calm my overly excited nerves!

 


As we made initial approaches into Lexington, the man in the seat next to me taps me and whispers, "Here we are!" and I leaned over to grab this picture:



When I got to the airport and saw my friend from all the way back in 3rd grade, it was like no time had passed. Even when we were best friends at 9 years old, we'd spend hours on the phone. (Think teenage girl on your favorite sitcom.) The whole weekend was one big phone conversation catching up on college events, family happenings, and the like. We graduated high school together, but somewhere between third and twelfth grade, we just lost touch. It was so nice to chat literally all weekend. I was starving by the time we'd gotten to her house, so we had spring rolls and rice for a late dinner. 
Early the next morning, I was awake at the crack of dawn out of excitement. I had scheduled paratransit service from my friend's house to campus, and I was told that they'd be there by 8:30. At 8:15,  there was a knock on the door. The driver had come all the way to the door to assist me with steps, bags, etc. and onto the bus. For the small fee that it costs, the service is wonderful! I'm so relieved that the level of independence that the service offers will be available, and I just can't wait! I had a 9am meeting with the Accommodations Consultant in the Disability Resource Center, and I can say for certain that the services and the willingness to help makes me all the more excited for four months from now! Then, I was graciously given a private golf cart tour of campus (thanks, Sarah!) sponsored by the UK Visitor Center.  Check them out if you're interested in a campus tour! It was phenomenal. The guide even stopped so that I could take a few pictures along the way:



This is historic Memorial Hall. Aside from the library, when you see a picture of UK, it's usually of this building. It is absolutely stunning, and its architecture reminds me of my undergraduate institution.



This is William T. Young Library, probably the most famous building on campus. It is the second largest academic library in the nation next to Harvard, and most importantly, it has a Starbucks inside.

That afternoon, after having lunch in a tall tower in the center of campus and visiting the bookstore, I used the paratransit service to head home. The same quality was presented on the return trip, and to be quite honest, it makes me so much more excited to be in Lexington. We enjoyed dinner and frozen yogurt after both of our days had ended, and then we headed off to the Movie Tavern, where you can order food and beverage while you watch a movie. It was a neat experience, and I would highly recommend checking to see if there's one in your area!

On Saturday, we started by apartment hunting and touring a bit of the city, and then we stopped off at Good Foods, the co-op in town that has all organic, non-GMO products, along with a cafe and bakery. I was fascinated and plan to take full advantage.

Probably the highlight of my Saturday, aside from finding the perfect apartment complex, was meeting the AcoUstiKats and seeing them perform at the Woodford Theatre. They are UK's premier male acapella group and have been made recently famous by NBC's The Sing Off. Getting to meet and take photos with these guys was so much fun!



Then,  on Sunday, we toured the town and the downtown areas, and a few pictures that I took are truly what I've always thought of Kentucky to look like. Take a peek:
 

Unfortunately, early Monday morning meant it was time to head to the airport to fly home. In the time that I was there, I became even more excited to call Lexington my new Kentucky home in four short months and can't thank my friend Robin enough for being such a wonderful tour guide and hostess. I'm so thankful for such a warm and inviting place to call home soon!

Disability in Graduate School (Or Simply in Life)

I've had plenty of time to do some thinking on the ways that having a disability might actually be advantageous when beginning graduate school this fall. There are rare occasions in which individuals reflect on the positives of something that might challenge the way that they live their lives, but I think it could prove to be an interesting way to learn to appreciate the small things and the unexpected blessings.

Disability is almost always synonymous with "unconventional".  Just because I button a pair of jeans with one hand doesn't mean that my jeans are never buttoned. Though I can't explain to someone how I accomplish it with one hand, I just do. In graduate school, I surmise that many of the research articles that I will read or the papers that I will write will involve complicated intricacies that will drive people to ask, "How do you understand any of what you're studying?" Truthfully, the only way I can and will explain it is that it's what happens when passion is evident. Just like when you realize that you're the only one who can button your pants, it just happens.

One quickly learns that some things just take time. For me, I've had to come to terms with the fact that it's okay if it takes me an hour to get ready to go run errands. The important part is that I accomplished the task independently, and I, most of the time, am confident with the work that I complete. Graduate work isn't conducive to completing the three page paper you forgot about in the two hours before it's due. You can't procrastinate. You can't expect quality if you aren't willing to put in the quantity in the form of time. It's okay that you had to cancel the coffee date with your friend if it means that you're less stressed about the 6 hours it took to put your best effort into the paper. Write the paper, and then reward yourself with the coffee date. You'll feel much better that way because the best things just take time.

The application is just as important as the acquisition. Most of us with disabilities similar in nature to my own spent most of our childhoods in physical and occupational therapies to acquire the skills to live, work, and grow independently. While using stretchy bands to improve quad strength and doing 200 "donkey kicks" while watching television is important, climbing the hills of campus can't become a reality until someone sees that he/she can actually climb the hill or walk the mile distance between a classroom building and the library. Similarly, the textbooks and the coursework are vital in graduate school, but applied experience, such as an internship, truly tests that knowledge. "Thinking on your feet" is challenging, and especially for disciplines like the one I'll be entering, it's just as important to apply effectively as it is to acquire successfully.

You know yourself best, no matter what all the advice in the world says. For years, people with and without disabilities have offered advice on how to do various tasks that have proven challenging. While I often appreciate their advice and concern for me, I have earned to keep in mind that I know my needs and abilities better than anyone. Much like the advice given to new parents, applying to and starting graduate school, as well as living with a disability, opens the proverbial floodgates for all the advice anyone has ever learned. Remember, take what you wish, but you know yourself better than anyone ever will.

Admittedly, there is much more that could be added to this list, but I am enormously grateful for the lessons that life has taught through challenges, and I am eagerly awaiting the chance to apply them to my graduate school experience in 2014!

Blogging Every Day: Graduate School, I'm On My Way

Happy New Year, everyone! In years past, I've been one to make many resolutions, but in my current situation, I'm hesitant to do that because so many things could change at any point right now.

Instead, however, I'm planning to blog every day, if even short posts. The reason for setting this goal is three-fold:

I'd like to rekindle my love for writing. I've always loved to write, and through my last little while in college, the only writing that I had time for was my required research papers and class activities. It's not that those exercises weren't enjoyable, but as always, there's something about the freedom of choice that feels...well, free. I am a guest contributor to a few sites around the internet, but there's something to be said for my own personal space to allow myself to let my hair down.

I want to help. My perspective, a soon-to-be graduate student with a little extra challenge, is a rare one to be seen on the internet, so if I can help just one person, it's all worth it. I also want to help myself look back to realize just how fortunate I am when things get a little trying. It's amazing how many people forget to  be thankful, and in 2014, or ever, for that matter, I refuse to be that person. I want to help people realize possibility, peace, faith, joy, and love. If it's just one person, that's simply enough.

I want to keep my skills sharp. More on this later, but it looks like 2014 will bring the start of a graduate program. In graduate school, there's so much writing that it's going to be crucial for me to keep my skills sharp in the interim period. There will be more detail later, for sure, but with the way that the program is set up, it's so important. Most professors have always been complimentary of my writing, but people are different, and it's important to keep every aspect of the skill sharp.

I'm excited to see what 2014 holds, and I am thrilled to have you along for the ride!

The Art of an Amazing Academic Adviser

Most students see their adviser twice a year: once for a midterm check-in during Fall semester and then to lift an adviser hold to allow registration for Spring semester courses.

When students who declare a psychology major at my institution first enter into the program, they are placed with a "pre" academic adviser who works in the student success center with many students. The criteria for being granted and transferred to a faculty adviser is to earn a "C" or better in the Introductory Research Methods and Behavioral Statistics courses. Usually, students have been reading about where they would like to end up in psychology, so much like picking a thesis adviser in graduate school, they choose an adviser whose research interests most align with their own.

In my case, I had switched majors twice before ultimately deciding to declare psychology as a major. More on that later, though. Because of that, I had to take both the statistics and research courses in the same semester, which was grueling. It was nice because many of the lectures overlapped, and I felt that one course was reinforcement of the other. I did excellent work in the classes because the professors were young, and they were motivated by their work. At the conclusion of those courses, it was time to move into the academic department for an adviser. The computer system automatically put me with a faculty member that I knew, but only through peers. In all honesty, I was more than intimidated by this man. He had gray hair, which meant he'd been working at his craft for awhile, he was a neuroscientist, and he wore bow ties all the time. How was this going to work? He teaches a lower-level neuroscience based course that I decided to take the following semester so that I could fulfill a degree requirement but also so that I could get to know his teaching style and to get to know his personality.

Instantly, the class was one of my favorite classes. It was discussion based, and we read books based on neuroscience topics like Rita Carter's Mapping the Mind for those of you who may be familiar. For each chapter in each of the three books we read, a group of four students would lead discussion and create a podcast with graphics and voiceovers to present to the class.  At the time, the podcasts were tedious because they required the use of GarageBand, which takes some time to master, but now, I am profoundly grateful for the knowledge that I have and the time that I spent with my classmates. I met some of my dearest friends, and my adviser and I instantly made a connection.

After that fall semester, I was to begin my academic credit internship. When I went to "lift" the adviser hold on my student record, Dr. I and I had a nice conversation about career options and what this internship would mean for me in terms of graduate school and a career.  That conversation started it all. I knew that I didn't have anything to worry about in terms of advisement; he was probably the best in the department.

This past fall semester, I was enrolled in his Behavioral Neuroscience course, which is arguably the most challenging required course for psychology majors. For every class, I sat in the right corner of the front row, where any sighs of "You're going too fast!" could be heard without much commotion. We had lots of interesting things that we'd talk about before and after class, and I cherished it. It was one of the first times in my four-and-a-half years that I felt academically validated. I will be forever grateful for it. When there were some extreme difficulties with the course due to impairment related to my physical challenges, we compensated. And we compensated well. I've never seen anyone devote as much time to his work as his students the way Dr. I. does, and trust me, we all benefitted. Now, I'm looking into neuroscience programs and figuring out if my time in his class should be explored further. That, my friends, is the art of an amazing academic adviser.